After my dog’s recent passing, my mother and sister gave me Coco Memorial Gift – to pay for having my carpets cleaned. It is a thoughtful gift inasmuch as Coco, at the end of his life, being deaf and blind, didn’t feel safe outside. He often took care of potty needs inside. I tried to keep up with the cleaning, but it’s very hard with carpet. Thank goodness it has been summer, so doors and windows are regularly open.

I miss Coco so much that I ache all over, and cry often. So whenever the scent of his urine fills my nostrils rather than disgust me I feel better, like he is here, like that something is not really missing. I’m comforted. I have procrastinated on calling the carpet cleaners, and I’m sure that is a large part of it. Grief is a friggen’ weird deal. I hope after they clean the carpets I won’t be spending time on the floor sniffing around to see if I can still find one remaining trace of his scent.